Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Switching gears...

Have you also noticed that every time I have a something positive to report it's almost immediately followed by frustration or setback? I have. I don't know if I get super excited, only to let myself down or I jinx myself or what... but I do know I'm over it. I'm going to practice some "guarded enthusiasm"...

I've started my new training sessions with Sean... so far, so good. We're a lot of doing elliptical and treadmill workouts and it's been going pretty well. It's still early in the game, but it is nice not to have my shoulder hurting all the time. The only thing that is going to make the back pain go away is losing the weight again... and that is going to take time and patience mixed with hard work!

As for my assessment, it went as expected. In a way, it was actually a relief to see my numbers in black and white... they weren't pretty, but they are my reality at this time. I've decided that beating myself up for them is futile. Live and learn and move on...

Happy Tuesday!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Time to rewind... (since I'm going backwards anyway)

Things imploded yesterday at the gym... I've continued to have back and shoulder pain and it has been holding me back. The back pain is exactly the same pain I used to feel when I was heavier and I have no doubt that it is related to the weight that I have gained back. I used to be able to handle a lot heavier weights, and now I struggle with lighter ones. I was the elephant in the room (pardon the pun).

Yesterday during my workout when my back starting acting up (literally bringing me to tears again), Sean said "I think we need to back off on the strength training for a while". This broke my heart... I know it's probably true, but I am afraid that without the strength training I am heading for disaster. I need to keep going. I need to lose this weight. I am DESPERATE to lose this weight... I tried hard control my tears the best that I can.

So, what's next??? Lots of cardio, rehab exercises, and strict nutrition. I did HIIT on the elliptical training this morning for 30 minutes and while I worked hard, I noticed that I couldn't do as much there as I once could. How much exactly had I been slacking with the extra cardio?? Clearly, more than I led myself to believe. I'm going to persevere and get back to where I once was... it's just going to take patience.

Wish me luck!
Happy Wednesday!


Thursday, February 11, 2010

Things are looking up!

Hello... it's been a while since I posted. My blogging and my 10K training have taken a long winter's nap.

Sunday is a very special day for me (and it has nothing to do with that Hallmark holiday). It's my 2-year anniversary of going to the trainer and changing my life. Even though I've had my ups and downs on this journey, the most important thing is that I haven't given up! I have a long way to go on this quest for a healthier life and I'm pretty sure the best has yet to come...

I had a good workout today with Sean. It was exactly what I needed. And while it's going to take more than one good workout to fix my current situation, I have hope that maybe I can still make training with Sean work. I need to figure out what exactly I want and need from my trainer, and communicate that to him.

So I have an assessment on Saturday. I know that I've gained a bunch a weight and I think I'm going to keep the results of this one to myself... I should probably update the weight loss ticker too, but I think I may just leave it where it is. Maybe I should take it down until I get back to losing again???

Happy Thursday!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A case of the blahs...

This weather is killing me... 17 years ago, when I decided to come to Richmond for college I honestly thought I was getting away from terrible winters. My senior year of high school brought weather that made NYC close twice... that was enough for me to get the heck out of dodge!

And now, we're looking at the possibility of a 3rd big snowstorm this season! I am so unprepared. My civic is not equipped to drive in this and to be perfectly honest, I don't trust others driving in it either. I'm pretty tired of being dependent on my 4WD-driving friends to get around. And the thought of being stuck at work again just makes me so sad... I did it in December and it was not fun. I keep praying that the meteorologists are wrong (but so far that's not working...)!

It has been a challenge to get my exercise in which is not helping matters either. It's been over a week since I have been able to do 10K training (first swamped at work, then this weather). I think not getting the exercise in is also breaking my spirit... I want to stay positive, but can't seem to actually do it.

Anyway, I just wanted to check in. I'm sorry it's not a more cheerful or inspiring post... but if it were, it wouldn't be real.

Happy Tuesday!

p.s. - I wanted to thank everyone for all of the support! Lots of people have been telling me they're following me on my blog... it means so much to me to know I have so many cheerleaders!